Gender Confusion
by BadWeebFics
Summary: Tala and Bryan wanted to make The Perfect woman. Unfortunately, Rei was their unintentional victim. KaixRei TalaxBryan Rei changes gender


Suri: Oh, I am evil.And Look, I HAVE KIT!

Almighty Kit: Hi!

Suri: How's It been?

Almighty Kit: (gone)

Suri: What the..?

Kit: (comes back) Sorry, my molecules keep shifting out of place.

Suri: You've had too much candy, my dear.

Kit: No I haven't! (gone again)

Suri:...Anyways...

Kit: BACK! Let's count down to the new fic...5..

Rei:..4...

Kai...3...

Suri:..2...

Kit:...1...KICK IT, HOMIE!

Suri: Kit, say it right.

Kit: Right..Chapter one of...

**Gender Confusion**

Kai's POV

Okay, some people would call Rei a person of "indeterminate gender". Especially when his hair was down. I felt bad for him. He was so dedicated in what he did, some people laughed at him and called him a "sissy". I was baffled. Rei was a truly respectable figure. He was the only one on the team I could truly stand. He wasn't a girl to me.

And yet, the Rei sitting across from me had an annoyed look on his flushed face. "Nothing fits!" He exclaimed. "Rei, it's fine. No one's going to molest you if I'm around." He whined, reluctantly pulling the skintight shirt over. "Kai, I can't go out. My dignity has evaporated." I placed my hand on his shoulder. "Look, Rei, this is not fun at all. It must piss you off a lot." Rei rolled his eyes, tugging on the shirt. I took his hands away. "These...things! They make all my damn shirts tighter!" He groaned.

"Rei, they're called 'breasts'. You may have them for a while, so live with 'em." Yes, Rei has breasts. No, he was not born like that. It's all because of Tala and Bryan. I'll tell you all why:

_Flashback_

_"We shall create the perfect woman!"_

_"Why...?"_

_"I don't know. We're bored." _

_Rei just sat in the corner with a cup of tea, smiling at their antics. "Let them go on with it, Kai." he said cheerfully. "They might come up with something good." I shook my head. "Rei, you can't be so kind to these two. They're mischeif makers!" Rei shook his head. "Sorry,Kai. They haven't harmed me yet, so I can't oppose them." I coughed and looked to Bryan. "Forgetting someone?"_

_"Kai, I've forgiven him. He was being controlled."_

_And then, without warning..._

**_ZAP!_**

_"Aaaaah!" I heard Rei scream as a large light hit him. "REI!" I yelled, running to him. Tala gasped. Bryan smacked himself in the head. "Сука,Сука,Сука...Вы - такая сука..." (Bitch, Bitch, Bitch..You're such a bitch!") Tala told him not to blame him, and I looked to the limp body in my arms. "Oh,God, Rei..." I went to place a hand on his chest._

_And blushed furiously._

_"What the HELL?" I shouted. "What?" Tala inquired. "Dammit, he has boobs!" I yelled. Bryan smacked his head into the wall. "Oh...Oh God.." He was trying to contain his laughter. "Bryan, stop it!" Tala hissed. "Look, Kai, um...Rei..is now the perfect woman."_

_"WHAT?" I roared. "So, what, he has OVARIES NOW?" Bryan looked to the sky. "God? Some assistance?" I let Rei down gently. He soon got up._

_"Ne...? My chest feels heavier." He looked down his shirt._

_"OH MY GOD!"_

_End Flashback_

"Kai..don't make me go out like this..." I gripped his shoulders. "Look, Rei, any minute now, Tyson's going to kick that rookie's ass. We have to go out there and be sports. Hopefully no one will notice you." Tyson hopped in. "AFTERPARTY!"

"...Fuck."

(Later)

Rei's POV

"So, sexy, want to come back to my place and do it?" I shot the guy a disgusted look. "Go away, you pervert." followed by some shouting in cantonese, and the guy walking off, steamed. "See, Kai?" I said, annoyed. "Why did you make me come? My ass hurts from getting grabbed so much, and apparently my eyes are now at my chest." He looked at me. "Relax." I hung my head.

Another guy came. "Whoah...You're hot. Are you still a virgin?" I blushed. "Yes." I said shyly, knowing I shouldn't have answered at all. "Okay, want to lose it with the hottest thing alive?" I shook my head. "No." He grabbed my wrist. "Of course you do! Come on!" I screamed. "Let me go! Let me go! C'mon, you boar, let me go!" I struggled.

All of a sudden, two strong arms hung around my waist. "Mmph.." What? More rapists. "Let go. She's with me." Kai. I sniffed. "Hey, she said she'd go with me." He started imitating him. "Hey, she's not that kind of girl, you git." I stepped back, closer to Kai, he removed my hand from the pig's wrist. "C'mon, Rei." I nodded, and scurried along.

**TBC...**


End file.
